Thursday, April 19, 2012

and so I blog

I have a story and I don't know what to do with it. 

Part of the story is really sad. It's about a dream shattered.

But, a lot of the story is fascinating.  It's a story about a grace awakened. It's about communion and repentance. It's about friendship. It's about the beautiful, terrifying work of Christ as he is making all things new. It is not, however, a story about how the shattered dream pieces were picked up one-by-one and glued back together as if it had never been broken. Sorry. In one sense I would like to tell you a story like that, but I cannot. 

But, the grace is sweet.  And some of those broken off pieces are being redeemed like mosaic glass.

Anyhow, this is my story… sort of.   My story is also his and her and their and your story. It's our story. Oh, and trust me -- I never wanted this role in your story. In my mind, my role would be much more like... I don't know what.  But, I think it had something to do with curling up in big squishy chairs drinking hot tea from real china cups in my breakfast nook. Long talks in which my vast wisdom (ha!) bubbled out of me in sweet, gospel-driven advice on life,  on how to raise children, on how to make a home, on how to love people.  Like... your husband.


Oh, well. This is the me we are all stuck with - the broken, wounded, scared, blessed, ridiculous, stronger me. I am a photographer, a full-time student, a Behavioral Health Rehab Specialist, and a divorced ex-pastor's wife with 5 kids and I
want to do something with my story.

...and so I blog.


  1. You are a gifted writer! Can't wait to read more. So happy you're my friend!

  2. Marisa said that she is so happy you are her friend! I am even more blessed to call you my sister...not just in Christ but in blood! Please keep writing as already I am hungry for more....

    luv you

  3. I don't even know what an RSS is, but i think it automatically feeds me stuff when people update blogs, and so I need to learn how to make it work. Can't wait to read more from your gifted mind/hands/heart.

    1. You can go to Google Reader and "subscribe" to the blogs you want. Then when there's a new post, it will show up. I made a bookmark tab for Google Reader and click on it every now and then. There's probably a more efficient way, but I dont know what it is.

      So thankful for y'all and your part in the story...

  4. Oh, you are such a good writer. And this is a wonderful idea. I miss you friend. Let's drink tea from china cups next time I'm around.

  5. Well I think I am at the beginning and already your story sounds so hauntingly familiar. You also remind me already of another photographer, mother of 5, lives in the midwest and wrote a little book you may have heard of called 1000 Gifts, Ann Voskamp. If you haven't heard of her, I would of course suggest you read her book as soon as possible--only possible down side being that she has a solid Christian farmer husband who dotes on her. But the rest is just..."prosetry." Kate Finnamore Leffew (no matter which gmail account shows up below! )